A "Normal" Day at Forks High

Joan eyed him carefully, as he turned away to stare out at the ocean. 'He doesn't seem like the killing type. And neither does Alice. But still... I wonder why it must be like... To be a monster. I bet it's a horrible feeling, knowing your existence is somewhat dependent on killing... He carries the burden well,' she commented admiringly.

"Stop it," He chastised her but continued to stare out at the ocean.

Joan was a bit surprised by the abrupt command but didn't comment any further. Instead, she took a seat at the edge of the shoreline and continued on with her earlier explanation, "Y'know, you guys aren't really making the process any easier by stepping in and saying, 'Oh you better not say anything or I'll kill you!' It kind of defeats the whole point of me trying to forget if you guys are going to just enter into my life and try to be my best friends."

Edward turned to her with a somewhat mocking smirk, "But isn't that what you want, Joan? To befriend danger and have excitement in your life like all the comic book heroes you admire?"

She sighed and leaned back on her arms, looking directly up at his eyes, telling him defiantly, "The whole point of comic books is an escape, really. It's nice to dream that we'll all have some sort of adventure in our lifetime but sometimes, you just have to accept reality for what it is. Even if some members of the undead decided to blend in with society."

She paused, "And you don't have to be such a royal prick about it."

Edward looked absolutely bewildered; he questioned a bit hesitantly, "How-Why don't you sound or think like-"

"A normal teenager?" She finished for him as she looked back out to the sea, shivering a bit still from the cold wind, "Because some people grow up faster than others. And maybe my early maturation may lead to an even earlier death but at least, I can die happy, knowing that I was all I could be and more."

They remained in silence as minutes passed, seagulls flying by, squawking obnoxiously. The low tide lapped at Joan's bare feet as she buried her toes beneath the sand.

"Incredible," was all Edward could think of to say at that moment.

Joan gave an uneasy smile, asking, "So are we done doubting me?"

Edward nodded twice, finally showing a happier smile, "Yes, we are. Or at least I think so. But don't think we're walking out of your life so easily."

Joan joked in a shaky voice, "Oh darn. I was hoping the 35-year-old in me would scare you off."

Edward gave a hearty chuckle at her attempt to make things light-hearted which eased the tension in her body a little.

Suddenly, there was a loud ringing noise coming from the car. It sounded like a pop song you would hear on the radio. It made Joan groan and fall backwards into the sand.

Edward asked teasingly, "Don't want to talk to your father?"

Joan replied honestly, "No, not now. I have such a headache... And all his concern will make me feel guilty and God, why don't you answer the phone?"

Edward smiled somewhat mischievously and disappeared for a second, reappearing in the next, with her still ringing cell phone in hand. He asked mockingly, "Should I tell him that I've killed you and buried you in the forest?"

Joan snatched the phone from Edward and thought, 'You're such a jerk. And to think, you act like we've been friends for years when we've only just met now...' He shrugged amiably as she flipped it open, "Hey dad."

"Hey, sweetie. Heading home anytime soon?"

"Do you need me home?"

"It'd be nice to have someone at dinner to talk to..."

"Give me an hour. I'm in Friday Harbor."

"Dang, girl. Well, drive home safely."

"Mmkay, dad. Love ya."

"Love ya too."

She hung up the cell phone, staring up at the somewhat clouded sky in relaxation. She closed her eyes and imagined herself alone and resting peacefully for once. But a presence hovered nearby, making her eyes fluttered open. Edward was crouched down next to her, pure amusement on his face.

He told her, "If you want to make it home in a hour, we're going to need to leave now."

"Fine," she said with resolve, standing up to brush all the sand off of her. They walked back over to her minivan, both of them stopping in front of the driver's seat.

Joan was about to climb in but Edward advised her, "Oh and I should probably drive."

"God, fine!" She exclaimed, walking around to the other side and opening the passenger's door with unnecessary force, "But this isn't your shiny sports car, okay? It's not going to go as fast as that stupid refrigerator on wheels."

"Hey," He said defensively, "Don't insult my Volvo. And I'll take good care of your car. Now, just put on your seat belt so we can get going." And he drove off fast, as usual.

(OOC: Do I get the prize for longest post?)

(OOC: Day-ummmmm, Annie, that took me freaking FOREVER to read!! Haha but it was worth it. <3 Now I need to think where the hell I can take this...)

"Oh, you're no fun!" Alice pouted as Bella continued her panicking.

"No, I'm not, I'm just sane," Bella countered.

"Insulting a vampire? My, my, how you've changed," Alice giggled, then decided, "Let's go home now, alright?"

"Fine."

Alice gave Bella a once over before, "Hey, are you feeling alright?"

"I'm fine, Alice."

"Whatever," she shrugged as she got into her car. As soon as Bella was buckled in, Alice stomped the gas yet again in an effort to get home before Edward did.

I'll ambush him and ask him what happened, she thought to herself. Dumb Eddy, deciding to befriend Joan. That's my thing! Oh well, at least Joan's now doubly scared to death, she's not going to tell anytime soon, Alice reasoned as she pulled up to the Cullen mansion.

"Edward, you're such a moron," Alice chuckled as Edward told all the Cullens what had happened on the car ride to school. "You seriously answered her thoughts?"

"Oh, that didn't scare her shitless AT ALL," Rosalie and Emmett smirked. "Come on, we're gonna be late," Rose added.

"Snap, I have Biology with Joan," Alice moaned inwardly. "Ugh..."

Alice walked to Biology slowly, trying not to let the rising panic in her rise. Calm down, girl, she's only human! she calmed herself. Let's do this!

She strode into the room gracefully and took her seat, ignoring all the stares she was so accustomed to. Alice resisted the urge to look for Joan, instead choosing to look out the window in thought.

Alice looked up, slightly startled by Joan's voice. "Huh? Oh, sure," she moved her stuff from the seat next to her. "How scary was Edward yesterday? I have no idea what got into him," she added by means of apology.

She's talking to me? This is so bizarre...

"I scared you more than him? How?" Alice asked somewhat indignantly. "And yeah, he is like a kid, isn't he? At least you haven't spent the past half a century living with him," she chuckled.

"Oh...right," Alice blushed sheepishly. "Sorry about that. And no, I don't think so," she added, thinking. "Do you wanna come over sometime? We could have a sleepover!" she suggested happily.

"It's because you're afraid you'll become the meal, isn't it?" Alice asked Joan. "That's cool, wanna go shopping with me and Rosalie tomorrow? I swear your boyfriend Jasper won't be there," she smiled teasingly.

Alice laughed, "Yes, but we have school off because of Spring Break," she reminded Joan. "What do you say?"

I really hope she says yes, Rose needs to meet her, then she'll be safe, Alice thought.

Alice smiled sadly at Joan, then proceeded with her warm-up. Hell, she's just gonna abandon me for them, Alice thought somewhat angrily. I should just--No, Alice, calm down, a methodical voice in her head said.

Carlisle, get the hell out of my head, Alice snapped.

Hey, I'm just your hallucination, schizo, the Carlisle voice teased. And you know you don't want to kill Joan, she's your friend...of a sort.

KILL HER! KILL THE BITCH! a slightly more insane voice yelled.

Hello Rosalie, Alice thought. Yeah, I should, shouldn't I?

No, Alice, the Jasper voice cautioned her. If you were to kill Joan, you'd never forgive yourself, meaning I'd be forced to feel your guilt for the rest of eternity, he grinned in her brain.

Alice stopped herself from further seeing Jasper in her head, trying to maintain the conversation, You're right Jazz, but can you try not to be so sexy?

Hey, this is your hallucination, schizo, the imaginary Jasper countered.

You're right, I'm sorry, Alice apologized, then, Do you think Edward is listening to this from the room next door?

Oh, yes, the Edward voice assured her. Every word, he knows about us.

Damn, Alice swore, then tried focusing on the issue at hand. Fine, I won't kill her, but I will find a way to talk to her, Rosalie, and Esme all at once!

Why not just use your voices? Rosalie teased.

Not funny, Alice muttered, then began focusing on her schoolwork now that the Joan issue had a course of action.

Alice was passing notes with Bella when Edward stormed into their English class.

How'd it go? Alice thought to Edward.

He shrugged. She took it to mean, "I got my sparkling ass owned by that bitch."

Edward scowled at her interpretation. "Always expect the worse, don't you schizo?" he teased.

Alice paled. "You were listening?"

"Yes, Imaginary Edward was right when he warned you I was listening."

"Dumb voices," Alice muttered.

"Back to the matter at hand," Edward quietly snapped. "We need to find a way to reach out to Joan-"

"Can't you just give it a rest? Poor Joan must feel so annoyed with you guys!" Bella interjected.

"Or at least Edward," Alice agreed. "And I was so close...damn Tyler," she growled.

"Calm down tiger," Edward warned Alice. "We don't want you massacring the school."

"Whatever," Alice retorted. "I just want today to be over."

"It's been that bad, huh?" Edward asked.

"That and more," Alice moaned as she buried her face in her hands. "If I were human, I'd be jumping off the top of the school."

"No, if you were human, we would have never gotten into this mess," Edward corrected her.

"Edward, you seriously messed up by pissing off Joan," Alice told him. "Let the diplomacy fall to me, huh?"

"Oh, like scaring her shitless was SO much better," he rolled his eyes. "No, talking to her will be MY thing."

Don't make me sic Emmett and Jasper on you! she thought violently. You KNOW they'd take MY side!

"Don't remind me, I don't need paranoia that those two are going to rip me apart at any moment," Edward chuckled.

The bell rang, commanding the students to go to their next class. Alice got up at once. "Maybe we can talk to her during lunch, TOGETHER," Alice glared at Edward.

"Fine, fine," he agreed, and the three of them made their way toward the cafeteria. Alice chose to ignore Edward and Bella's lovey-doveyness, she HAD kind of stolen Edward away during English. Once there, Alice and Edward made their way to Joan's table, deciding their battle plan on the way.

"She's outside," Edward commented. "Shall we?"

"We shall," Alice said as she dragged Edward out to the courtyard where Joan was alone at a table. "Hello, Joan, mind if we join you?"

Alice glanced over at Edward as she sat next to Joan. "Are you feeling alright? You seem tense," she commented on Joan's appearance. "Did Edward piss you off that much?"

"Not much, we just wanted to hang out," Alice replied. "Is that a problem?"

"Yeah, we're not here to worsen your day," Edward added. "What were you listening to?" he nodded towards Joan's iPod.